Day 2 and a gift

Posted on January 12, 2022 | Leave a comment

Today has been amazing. I still didn’t sleep well last night, but this morning I got a call as he was coming back from his appointment asking if he could come up, and he had the keys with him. We had another fantastic conversation. The forgiveness card from last night was really important, because it clearly meant a lot to him that I knew he hadn’t done any of it deliberately or maliciously. What really surprised me was that he spoke of telling his family, and he also said that he didn’t want me to feel like I had to see the psych if I just wanted to move on. Wow.

All along my ideal scenario, which I had every indication would be unlikely, was that we could move forward as friends. That may or may not work over time, but it looks as though that’s what he’s now thinking too. I really, truly want the best for him, and would love to see him happy – just not at the expense of me and my own happiness. We’ve even negotiated how we’re going to handle the inevitable encounters that are going to happen living so close to each other. There were hugs and tears, but it felt natural and good. And healthy.

After he left, I drew a daily card. I got Isis, the card of Rebirth, with the alignment message.

The goddess Isis, with her powers of reincarnation, has a message for you: You are not broken. You are not wounded beyond healing, and opportunities are not necessarily lost forever. Your insistence on defining yourself by your losses and wound stories are not serving you now. Your alignment task is to fully accept things as they are, choose to find a way to put the pieces back together, let die what doesn’t serve you, and focus on what works. There is so much goodness to come from this situation, even if in this moment you feel trapped. The goddess Isis wants only the best for you. As your fierce ally, she will challenge you when you go off track. So pick up the pieces, tell a new story, and find home again. You will be amazed at how beautifully things come together when you reject the trap created by the stories you tell yourself. You have the key. Use it.

The part that sticks out for me is “let die what doesn’t serve you”, but I had to laugh when I saw the end – having literally just got the keys back. When I read the empowerment version, it was about reviving and regenerating what was broken so the reversed definitely makes more sense. I’m feeling newly inspired, not just with the blog – which I have not touched in a long time – but with business and personal stuff as well, so rebirth is totally my card for today.

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Day 1: Taking the Leap

Posted on January 11, 2022 | Leave a comment

Today was a big day. After way too long putting my needs aside, doing the female people pleaser bit and recent unsuccessful attempts to restore some balance and communicate the issues, I drew the line and made the leap of faith to put my own needs first. I ended the relationship, although I’m not sure he’s accepted that yet. He says he loves me and wants me in his life, and I’ve told him I’m open to building something more healthy with him if he’s willing to put in the work to create a new relationship, with professional help, but I’m not going back to what was before. I can’t. I have nothing left to give. The old relationship is definitely over.

So tonight, I drew a 3 card Oracle spread, from the Goddess Power deck.

Goddess Power Oracle – 11 Jan 2022 spread

Card 1: What do I need to know now for my highest good? Yuki Onna, alignment message

Card 2: What do I need to do, to manifest my highest good? Branwen, empowerment message

Card 3: What could the potential outcome be if I continue on this path? Benzai-ten, alignment message

Yuki Onna: “Some days you wake up frozen, stuck and unable to move due the effects of emotional denial and resistance to what is in front of you. Or maybe you are exhausted, spent from the emotional burden of your current situation. The winter goddess Yuki-Onna has come to help you move out of and past this experience into a healthier state of stillness. When you are frozen, it’s the ego that is refusing to accept life on life’s terms, potentioally causing you fear and depression. A particular situation pr person may be causing you to see yourself as a victim. The goddess Yuki-Onna reminds you that this is but a temporary moment in the millions of moments of your life. The task she has for you is to answer one question: will you trust the Great Goddess in the universe to be your active partner in co-creating? If so, slow down and let all your troubles go, and you will see the miracles life has to offer you”.

Branwen: Sometimes life invites us into conditions that challenge us to the core. As the Celtic goddess Branwen forgave those who caused her own death by a broken heart, she asks you to set yourself free from the seeds of resentment that will surely choke the life out of your dreams. We are wounded by others and weave stories about our hurts and losses that live on in our hearts and minds. We come to distrust the potential of love and connection. No matter what your story or when it began, forgiveness is the key to freedom here. Forgiveness allows for mending and repair, opening the heart to give and receive. If you need to forgive yourself or others, now is the time to do it. Keep your heart open, and you can begin again. Only beauty, freedom, and treasures are found in the spirit of forgiveness. The goddess Branwen is here to support you.

Benzai-ten: Your ability to see beauty in your world is dimmed by a momentary lapse in self-worth. The Goddess of beauty asks you whether you’ve been set back by a visit of perfectionism or others have withheld their support, causing you to feel small and insignificant? Whatever the circumstances, it appears that you have been hijacked by a sense of lack. Your alignment task is to restore your self-worth and regain your equilibrium by refusing to engage in these mind games designed to dim your light. Now is the time for a positive self-inventory. The Goddess Benzai Ten is here to remind you that you are a bright, shiny, beautiful being of Divine power and light. You are more than enough, and the world contains more than enough beauty for you; this is a good place to dust off and start again.

So, aside from having felt the energy shift after I broke it off, it seems the Universe agrees. I was exhausted, I do need to forgive myself, and my self-worth is badly in need of restoration. It’s definitely time to revisit all I learnt about self-care before I let it all lapse. It sounds trite, but today really does feel like day 1 of the rest of my life.

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A Question of Belief

Posted on November 7, 2011 | Leave a comment

If you knew there was no way you could fail, what three things would you most love to do?

Write them down. These are the things we explored in the three part article series on discovering your passion. These are, potentially, your goals.

Did you know that in a 1970 study, a graduating class at one of iStock_000003204840Medium America’s most prestigious Universities was interviewed about their goals. Today, 3% of that class earn more than the rest put together.

What was the difference that set those 3% apart?

No, it wasn’t that they had goals – about 60% of the class passed that one. It wasn’t just that they wrote them down, either. There were 10% that did that.

Those 3% of students, today multimillionaires, had goals, wrote them down, and took it one step further by reading them, 3 times a day.

And they achieved them.

You’re probably starting to wonder exactly what that has to do with the title of this article, right? Well, that final step, the one that made all the difference, is the one that impacts most powerfully on your belief system. The more often you hear something, the more likely you are to believe it. And it doesn’t have to be someone else doing the talking.

How can you take advantage of that? What beliefs would make the biggest difference to your life today, vs the life you’d like to have. If you’ve decided where you want to go, and are having trouble getting there, maybe it’s time to stop and look at where you really believe you should be. Not from the point of view of revising your goals, but to see what’s stopping you getting there.

“What the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve”. We’ve all heard it. How far along the journey are you? Has your mind conceived big dreams? (if not, I recommend you read “The magic of thinking big”) If you’re not on your way to achieving them, then you’re still on the road, and it’s all about belief. What beliefs do you need to get rid of? What new ones can you set up that would help you go further? This is where self talk can help you so much to create your new reality, as well as uncover the hidden parts of your current one that are holding you back.

Bottom line, the reality you create for yourself is not just the Strawberries with blank recipe book and check tableclothone you dream of getting. It’s the one you convince yourself you deserve, and will not let go of. Write those goals down, read them at least daily, and learn to believe in yourself – for a better future.

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How to Improve Low Self Esteem

Posted on September 26, 2011 | Leave a comment

The Big Issue. Why do so many people feel that they aren’t worthwhile – that they aren’t important?

Did you know that in Australia, there are now more deaths by suicide than there are by Road Accidents? THAT many people feel life isn’t worth living. Is this a problem with each of them? No, I’d say if it’s that extensive we need to look a bit wider to find the cause. Sure, their solutions were personal, but it’s not right to blame the victim for the disease.

We live in a culture that values things over people. Money over people. Job descriptions over people. There is nothing in our society today that gives us the message that we, as people, are worthwhile just as we are! Some people try to find that message through religion, others try to make themselves feel worthwhile by “success” on a financial, career or relationship level. It’s something we’ve learnt to look outside ourselves to find.

We grow up in “nuclear” families that are overstretched time and money wise, and haven’t got the energy or attention to devote themselves to us, as children. We get attention only when we do something. Cry, throw a tantrum, giggle, whatever. It’s not US getting the attention – it’s our actions.

Then we get older. Remember the scolding you got when you were old enough to break something? What message does that hold – “you are not worth as much to me as this thing was”. Not only do we need to do things to attract attention and get loved, we now learn that objects are more important than we are – we have to defer to them and be careful.

OK. There are a few more steps, but then we get to the media. TV and radio advertising. In a materialistic society, it’s all based around trying to make people feel that they’ll be better off with whatever it is being sold. We’re poked in our insecurities and told “you may not be being loved or respected now, but wait! Buy this and you’ll get all the love/respect/attention you want! And LOOK! It’s only $29.95 (or whatever)” We buy it. Actually, we buy the message behind it. And after years of buying it, when still don’t have all the love, respect and attention we expected, we start to think there’s something REALLY wrong with us – (obviously the things we bought aren’t at fault, we’ve been convinced they would work in order to buy them in the first place).

The story goes on. Only eighty years ago anyone who had a job was looked down on – everyone was self-employed! They were butchers, farmers, bakers, whatever – they were responsible for themselves. Today, it’s exactly the reverse. Anyone who tries to take control of their own finances is laughed at, looked down on and told “it’ll never work” repeatedly. It’s normal to give control over your finances – and therefore your survival – to a boss.

Is it any wonder, with so few people feeling they have any control over their money, that there are so few people who control a decent amount of money? A quote I read recently, although I can’t remember who it was from, said in effect that if all the money in the world was redistributed evenly – it would take no more than several months for it to be back in exactly the same pockets as before. I think I agree.

The first step to Self-esteem is to start feeling in control. Whatever areas you can – reclaim control over your life. Set boundaries. Make decisions for yourself. Start feeling the power you do have. It’s amazing how much of a difference that can make.

And of course, you can check out the 10 day course I’ve put together to give you all the tools you need to start your journey to empowerment – details are at http://selfpositivity.com/10-days-to-empowerment/


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Posted in 10 Days to Empowerment

Smile

Posted on May 21, 2011 | Leave a comment


It’s sad but true – there are all too few things or people that give us a reason to smile these days, and life definitely throws us way too many reasons not to!

I’m working on a course to teach YOU how to believe in yourself again. Enjoy the video above, and sign up for other cool stuff I find as I put it together – plus first heads up when it’s ready.

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